This is what Vanessa wrote about Returning to Virtue for Value Experience #3.
Alma 5
I feel like me countenance is always flickering on and off. I do well for a few days and feel like I really am doing my best to represent God and then I feel my light flickering off and I don’t do so well. Then when I find inspiration to turn that light back on the whole tone of the home changes.
I cannot even imagine what that day will feel like to stand in front of God with our imperfections. We all have them but with forgiveness and how Jesus suffered for us they can all be washed away. When you even understand a little bit the shame and heartbreaking disappointment you will feel in yourself it scares me into making sure I am pure and white. When I try to picture the sadness and heartbreak in Heavenly Father and Jesus’ eyes when they see their child or sibling stand before them dirty…I cannot image it. I just know I don’t want to be one of those.
Somedays I am prepared, somedays I am not. I need to learn how to keep myself more steady.
Answering the same questions that were asked in Alma 5 honestly terrified myself. I am not ready, I am not trying hard enough. I am in charge of two little girls that need to start getting ready themselves.
Lots of work to do.
